19; Nearing 9 Months
My new year has already begun. I am now in the new age of 19. My birthday always leaves me winded with the realization of just how young I am, in comparison to how old I feel.
Time, for me, still has that same aspect it has for years: seeming so short, yet feeling so long in the quantity of life that’s been lived within a short span. With that perspective still in tact, strangely I have this stagnant feeling.
Waiting for a child to arrive in your world for nearly 8 months is a very dream-like state to live in. The fetal movements, and recent consistent enlargement of my belly reminds me that this is all a work in progress. I’m patiently awaiting the day. Though it draws nearer more so now than ever, I’ve waited so long, leaving me in a sort of disbelief that it will actually occur.
I’m just taking a long stroll at sunset, enjoying the fall and winter weather, change of scenery and my companion’s company. Every moment is being experienced through slow-motion: my mind is keeping me in a slight stand-still for the memory of today, instead of the wanting of tomorrow.
December 7th, 2006 at 3:56 am
Happy belated birthday! Oh they’ll start coming around quicker than ever from now on..
What’s the due date for the bub? I’m assuming January sometime if all goes according to plan? Not there’s ever really a set plan for these sorts of things
Wow.. I can’t even imagine how things must feel for you at the moment. I mean, you think about these things & what it’s like, & what an amazing thing it is.. but you never really understand until it’s you do you..
Oh the Nintendo theme you have going on is great!! Too bad if your kid isn’t into gaming & that sort of thing.. how out of place that would be with you & Chris! Though it sounds like a fun environment to grow up in..
It’s funny how you get sudden urges for website redesign & updates eh.. It’s also strange because every time I do a big overhaul, I do it believing it’ll help me get back into it all. But then I have to force myself to write an entry & it’s still just meaningless dribble. This time though, I’m actually finding myself in the middle of something & suddenly wanting to post something.. so bizarre.
Well I think I’ll go shower & work on a craft project for a bit.. I’ve spent too much time on here today. I blame it on my new toy.. :p