Oooh Boy!
Where to begin?! I certainly cannot fill in every detail of the last months of my life. That is partially why I haven’t attempted to log my life lately. I’m so concerned with the details, but I know I can’t capture events thoroughly without sitting down to write that very day. Instead I procrastinate, promising myself that I’ll sit down to get a good overview down.
Now that that’s over with, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty! New to old, because I’m backwards.
• Christopher Dee and I have just begun to settle into our new home. I emphasize “home”, as we’ve moved up from our last residence of a one bedroom, one bath apartment that was really just a studio. We’re now inhabiting a three bedroom, two bath house. Brick construction, tile flooring throughout, completely new kitchen, and a yard complete with a doggy-door entrance for our CD-Puppy. Now we have more than enough space for a seperate office space, which will be helping us to get our business off the ground more and more. I’ll be posting photos once we’re completely situated, and I feel it’s ready for a public showing. 
• In June I was contacted by my Father’s older Sister and Niece. At the time, this was a pleasant suprise, but it’s come to be otherwise since the day they showed up on my doorstep. I find it nearly impossible to go back to my “family” now having experienced the true happiness of great relationships and my own creation of a family. But that’s not what really compelled me to write about these individuals showing up in my life. They came bearing news that my Mother was desperately trying to find me. She claimed she was leaving for California by the 4th of July, which has come and passed without her showing her face to me. I was downright depressed for a good day, knowing that I may never see her again. Despite all I went through “because” of my Mom, I have come to be at peace with her recently. No matter what she said or did, I realize that she never stopped loving me and that I was always her “shinning star”. She truly wanted what was best for me, but was at a loss for the proper ways to act that out. Through my own inner struggles, I’ve come to find what brought her to who she now is: self-hate is a damning frame of mind. Not once has she stopped in her attempts to have me as her daughter again, in the fullest sense, so I may see her sometime in my future… I do hope. To tell her how much I love her, in the ways I didn’t realize before. Not just for who she was to me as a child, but for all of who she is and what she continues to show me despite her lack of presence.
• The biggest, brightest, and best news came to Christopher Dee and myself in late May. I had just returned from a brief road trip with his Mother Mary; the whole time I’d experienced the most immense breast pains. Since then I’ve survived weeks of morning sickness (to the fullest), a severe urge to pee, increased appetite (x3), and most importantly the scared-stress of another possible miscarriage. Yes, I am fully pregnant and this child is here to stay! 
On the 20th of July we were so privaleged to hear his/her heartbeat for the first time, and oh that was the happiest moment of my pregnancy thusfar! We don’t plan on finding out the gender until I give birth.? We decided on names a year ago, during my first pregnancy. Krislynn Night Pollard for a girl: the first name being a combination of Christopher and Jacqueline, the middle our favorite time of day. Dee Asbury Pollard II for a boy: Christopher’s late Father was the first, a great man by all means.? The birth will be all natural without painkillers or a dreadful hospital environment. This should all happen in late January, or possibly early Februrary, as these things aren’t quite predictable. Ironically our child will be 7 months old when Christopher and I wed on 7/7/07, not planned, just happen-stance!? I should be receiving an ultrasound quite soon, and I’ll share my child with you all visibly then. Currently, I’m developing a baby-belly more every week; I love sizing myself up in the mirror. 
I am fast approaching my 5th month, less than half-a-week away. So soon I’ll be feeling that kick, and I’ll jump for joy!
